Walk the Talk in Face of Adversity

Mar 5 , 2022
By Eden Sahle

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A young couple has always been optimistic and resilient. When someone needs help, they offer a hand. They are givers, counsellors and comforters. They are not a regular couple but the exceptions who put others' needs first.

They are also close to my family. When we recently lost our father, they were among the first ones to come and comfort us. Their usual optimism, cheerful attitude and advice were not absent. They told us to be strong and move forward. They said that what happened should not deter us from living life to the fullest, like our father wanted.

Listening to them certainly gave me a glimpse of hope, but then I wondered if they were this optimistic because their lives were going smoothly. They have nothing to complain about; no wonder they say only great things, it seemed to me. I was convinced that they would not have said what they said if they were in my shoes.

To everyone's shock, a short time ago, their precious daughter lost her life in a car accident right in our neighbourhood. It was sudden and unexpected. Her whole life was ahead of her; she was not even a teenager.

"This must be the end of the world," I said when I heard of the news.

As I was heading to their house to console them, I expected a couple who were losing it – a broken family. The words of my precious father when he said that the loss of a child is an unbearable loss to any parent was ringing continually in my ears.

But my expectations were not confirmed. When I went to their home, we held each other and wept. But they remained firm. Even then, they did not forget to comfort my family and I for the loss of our father. They asked how we were holding up. They told us to be strong. They proved that their resilience and optimism stood even in the face of excruciating circumstances.

They could withstand a sudden tragedy that had stolen their precious little girl. It does not mean that they did not experience deep suffering and pain over losing their only daughter. It does not mean that their lives did not change. But they had built a tough state of mind that they had been demonstrating to everyone before their tragedy.

What they have been advising my family and I, I saw them do. They were not living under a constant state of emergency. Unlike me, they were not convinced that they would never recover. They did not expect to live a life stained with grief. They were not speaking about our convergence of tragedies but to bounce back to hope again.

They made sure they did not stay down. Even when their happy family life was gone, they did not betray any sign of hopelessness. I have witnessed their incredible noble character in those painful days, moments, minutes, seconds, simple glances, and even silences. I am fortunate enough to have known such a remarkable family.

We could absorb a great deal from others if we only listened to their advice without judging that they do not understand our circumstances. Some people's life skills, emotional strength and attitudes are worth imitating.

Despite the odds, I witnessed a young family coming to terms with tragic loss in a healthy and positive way. In their strength, I learnt to add hope to my daily routines instead of welling up in sorrow. I learnt the importance of holding on to the joyful times and everything I was privileged enough to share and learn and become as a result of my father’s influence in my life.

Great people like that heroic couple can instil hope, dreams, standards, morals, and traits in us if we pay attention and learn. Even in their painful loss, they reminded me that I’m one of the lucky individuals who had a precious and unique bond with my father that is so difficult to explain, express, and hard to let go. Such people help us focus on the lasting, loving relationship with our loved ones that the cruel instance of death cannot take away.

All our various tragedies bond us and lead us to understand each other more profoundly as humans, irrespective of our experiences and backgrounds. Undoubtedly, we may have times when we suffer the pain of loss, but the deeper insight of ourselves that we have gained will, in time, provide us with growth.

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PUBLISHED ON Mar 05,2022 [ VOL 22 , NO 1140]

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