The Forgivers, Superheroes Amongst Society

Jun 26 , 2021
By Eden Sahle

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In an era when personal, political, and social upheaval is common, tolerance and forgiveness are necessary mental exercises that can keep us healthy physically and emotionally. We can find inspiration in this from our loved ones, as I do from my father.

Growing up, one of the things I witnessed in my father was his ability to forgive and respect others, including those that profoundly changed his life for the worst. They unjustly took his businesses, money and even threatened his life and that of his family. His offence was being from a particular place where people were not fond of at the time.

Not only did he forgive them, but he offered his helping hand when they needed it and continued to have an active social life in the community with them. As a teenager, these actions used to riddle me.

One of the main reasons I went to study law was to bring justice to victims such as my father, who have endured pain at the hands of others. There were many times when I thought that his initiative to forgive them was an act of disrespect to himself. Little did I know that it was these efforts that brought him inner peace.

Often unexpected violence erupts, changing our lives for the worse. The problem gets worse when the egotism of individuals, politicians and society goes unchecked and continues to cause harm. Most of the time, those that wronged us get defensive instead of being remorseful. But the power is in our hands to forgive them, finding catharsis in the process.

The level of mental maturity and stamina we can gain from ‘forgivers’ can help us get past events with people who even refuse to take responsibility for their wrong actions, finding a way to blame us or shift it to others. Making peace with the fact that hurt can come even from an unlikely individual or those close to us gives us the grace and compassion to let go of resentment. Whether we like it or not, experiencing pain is an inevitable part of life.

If we care enough about our mental and physical wellbeing, we have to be grounded in a belief that holding bitterness only ends up hurting us the most. Tolerance and forgiveness are the main interwoven aspects of personal and social accountability that reveal that conscious and unconscious violence against others is birthed from a selfish stance that disregards them.

We all possess a caring and uncaring nature. Thus, if we choose to occupy ourselves with our suffering and pain, not as fuel to rise beyond our challenges but as energy to bolster rage, we can inspire the worst in ourselves. In these, the most cynical periods that our nation has ever known, the way toward a more forgiving, hopeful, and compassionate route can build the fracture within society.

We live in a country where simple questions often turn into complex, difficult ones with no easy answer. The result of this is that it produces further tension and violence that is even more destructive. The catastrophic difficulties we continue to live with, the scope and scale of damages the nation has to rectify should be used to shine a light on tolerance and forgiveness.

After all, caring for others and forgiving their transgression is simple, when we make it out to be. If we do not make it hard with our anger and the need to take revenge, nothing is limiting us. The restrictions and conditions we put on ourselves in forgiving others further complicate situations for us, pulling us deeper into resentment. Indeed, forgiveness is a super-giant bitter pill we have to swallow. But once it is done, healing is immediate and paramount. As with everything else, the choice is ours.

Eden Sahle is founder and CEO of Yada Technology Plc. She has studied law with a focus on international economic law. She can be reached at edensah2000@gmail.com.

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PUBLISHED ON Jun 26,2021 [ VOL 22 , NO 1104]

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