Uncalled Judgment Exposes a Materialist Society

Nov 26 , 2022
By Kidist Yidnekachew ( Kidist Yidnekachew has degrees in psychology and journalism and communications. She can be reached at kidyyidnekachew@gmail.com. )

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It is difficult to find a society void of stereotypes. The level and how much those people subjected to it have tolerated it vary. But nothing beats the stereotype against women.

Women are judged by the things they do. The worst one is the judgement that lies under the source of their income. It is believed that most women's income source is out of men's pockets. It belittles the women striving to change their lives to build something for themselves and their families.

I was in the car with a friend in slow-moving traffic. This woman drove past us with one of the expensive cars that roam around the city lately. I said, "that is a nice car," and my friend nodded.

The driver in the car next to us had additional comments. He associated seeing a woman driving that type of car with a 'sugar daddy.' As we stopped at the traffic light, the man in the passenger seat tilted his head out of the window and said, "there is no way this woman could buy a car like that by herself."

He maligned her as if he saw the moment she was receiving money from a man. Surprisingly, the guy in the driver's seat nodded, acknowledging the comment. I could not help myself. I felt as if I was insulted, too, as a woman. Words escaped my mouth unconsciously.

"You don't know that."

"Why would you label someone you don't know as a gold digger?"

"She might be a businesswoman."

The man was shocked by the flowing responses as he was not expecting me to engage. With a smirking smile, he explained his past experience of witnessing many women like that out loud. His answer made me furious; I told him that he would be surprised to see how many men are known as gold diggers. Without a blink of an eye, he said he knew about it and drove passed us.

Why the man needed to generalise women like that was a question. Without any glimpse of hesitation, he told me that such conducts are widespread in the city. It is something that cannot be denied. I admitted that some women use their looks to get money and materials, but generalising hard-working women into that category is uncalled for. I did not think it was fair for those women to be labelled simply because they chose to drive an expensive car.

I started to mumble to myself but said out loud that there could be different reasons why a man could buy a car for a woman. Maybe he wants to spoil her, and a few million might not be a big deal. Even if she chose to be with such a guy for the benefit of financial gains, she made the decision. It is right from her point of view and what outsiders may state is irrelevant. The man is getting something out of the relationship; she did not steal from him.

At a young age, girls are taught to marry someone well-off who could look after them financially as if their sole purpose is looking pretty and waiting for a millionaire. I have to admit times are changing. Children are being raised to be self-efficient and dependable.

I notice how men like to tease women drivers on the road. They try to mess with them and test their limits.

But it warms my heart to see women taking advantage of those situations and outsmarting their teasers. I sometimes see men get offended. What drives me mad is seeing a society that bashes women for being with older and wealthy men without knowing the reason.

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PUBLISHED ON Nov 26,2022 [ VOL 23 , NO 1178]

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