Radar | Apr 12,2020
Jun 29 , 2024
By Eden Sahle
Recently, the well-known celebrity Zeritu Kebede has been the target of social media trolling. As she mourns the passing of her firstborn, people have had opinions on how she conducted herself during the burial ceremony and verbally attacked her.
When the overwhelming waves of grief hit her, Zeritu chose to shield herself with her faith. Her emotional maturity and belief in a higher power have shaped her response. However, this was not well received by online trolls who expected her to act differently. While some were genuinely concerned that not processing the loss of her son would affect her later when there would be less support, others made bold statements that lacked compassion and integrity. I hope this negativity never reaches her or her family.
I am aware of a culture where proper mourning equates to amplifying grief, to the point of hiring individuals to rile up others. However, expecting everyone to conform to the same standard is not appropriate. Finding comfort in believing that her son is in a better place allows Zeritu to hold on to hope, even in the face of unimaginable loss. Her journey through grief is not about denying her pain but about finding a way to live with it, grounded in her faith.
Who are we to set grief standards?
An important part of the spiritual journey is making sense of death. It does not stop us from being shocked or sad but gives us comfort that there is something better on the other side.
Hearing Zeritu say that she believes her son has gone to a place where he is loved more gives me a strange sense of courage. Despite the deep sadness, it is a reminder of her unshakable faith. Many people view her as a pillar of strength, and her faith is unyielding. Yet, some might wonder how someone can maintain such faith amidst profound grief. They might think she is in denial, refusing to fully accept her loss, and not allowing herself to outwardly express her sorrow.
However, Zeritu is not merely putting on a brave face; she embodies deep emotional maturity and genuine belief in what she speaks about. She is a mother who remains strong for her children, showing them the way even in her darkest hours. While she might not have fully processed her grief, her unwavering faith is her refuge in times of pain. She has not rushed through her grief but has allowed herself to feel and process it at her own pace.
Bullying has taken over the social media space. No one is immune to trolls, but celebrities are prime targets due to their large followings. It was understandable that Zeritu's loss became the talk of the town for weeks, considering her status. But it also made her a target for individuals who wanted to generate followers at her expense.
The lengths some individuals go to increase their fanbase is mind-boggling. Although I usually ignore such platforms, I took this personally because of my relationship with her. Commenting on how a person should grieve in the public eye is absurd. Some people believe everyone should operate the same way and meet cultural expectations.
In my lawyer days, I came across criminal cases where individuals ended a person's life for failing to meet their expectations. A husband killed his wife because she did not weep as much as he wanted her to at his uncle's funeral.
The stakes are even higher when there is no accountability. Social media encourages such behaviour while keeping anonymity. Online bullies would not engage in their damaging act if they met their targets offline. Being far removed from the person they are talking about, these bullies present their assumptions as facts.
Zeritu recognizes both the upsides and downsides of a public presence. She established boundaries early on and is surrounded by comforting people. She is shielded from those unkind individuals who try to add fuel to the fire while hiding behind a screen.
However, respecting people’s boundaries and focusing on facts should be the norm in our society. We must stop feeding on bad behaviours both online and offline.
PUBLISHED ON
Jun 29,2024 [ VOL
25 , NO
1261]
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