
Fortune News | Oct 14,2023
Dec 19 , 2020
By Kidist Yidnekachew
The world is home to many strange things. One of these is what lies behind the feeling most of us refer to as "love" – the hormone oxytocin. During physical interactions, its levels rise up. Women having higher levels of oxytocin than men, it is usually released during birth, lactation or sexual intercourse.
Research indicates nasal spray of oxytocin or intranasal oxytocin can be used to enhance bonding and social interactions. But consider the implication of this with further development of drugs - the potential to resuscitate love, bring back the raging flame and longing couples usually experience at the beginning of their relationships.
That flame dies at some point in marriage or a relationship. The possibility of keeping the flame alive for longer would be music to many people's ears. If only it were that easy, many would stand in line to get it. It is easier to sniff some substance and see if it reverts the magic than to try and fix a relationship. The latter requires patience, hard work, and there is always a chance it might not work.
A close friend of mine and her boyfriend of eight years could have used such a drug. Surprisingly, neither were bitter about the breakup. I was, since I used to look up to them. But she told me the love was long gone, and there was nothing else left. The boyfriend was of the same mind.
"There was no excitement in the relationship anymore,” he said. “Nothing to look forward to. We both knew everything there is to know about each other, and that made us predictable, boring."
I told him that I was sorry to hear that it was over between them.
“Nothing lasts forever, right?" he said.
He is right. I know lots of couples who break up after staying together for eight to 10 years. Just when I think they are tying the knot, they call it quits. I often wonder what the reason is.
Is it because they already feel like they are married and take each other for granted that they stop working on their relationship?
The emotion couples feel for each other is a complicated one. It is arguably conditional. We do not even love ourselves unconditionally let alone others without condition. Sure the conditions might not always be superficial but are highly dependent on the action of the loved ones.
For instance, a person that has a level of economic independence would not likely continue to live with an abusive partner. It might take them some time to realise what is happening and figure out how to get out of the situation. But in the end, they would do the right thing. Not doing this ultimately points to a certain emotional condition or an economic constraint.
I am sure that some would disagree. They may see the whole project of a relationship as an exercise in acceptance. Others would argue that it is an act of caring and affection. Still, others would argue that it is an uncontrollable desire to want that person, though this may border on obsession. However we look at it, it is not something that lasts forever. A whole range of social, financial and personal circumstances conspire to keep it alive; the most important is perhaps the latter.
Relationships are like plants. They have to be nurtured to grow. But the minute we stop working on our relationship, striving to build trust and companionship with our partner, the union is in trouble. There are no drugs able to reverse this, at least not yet.
PUBLISHED ON
Dec 19,2020 [ VOL
21 , NO
1077]
Fortune News | Oct 14,2023
Fortune News | Mar 09,2019
Fortune News | Mar 06,2021
Radar | Mar 05,2022
Radar | Apr 16,2022
Radar | Apr 27,2025
Radar | Feb 27,2021
Fortune News | May 09,2020
Radar | Jun 30,2024
Radar | Aug 28,2021
My Opinion | 129944 Views | Aug 14,2021
My Opinion | 126247 Views | Aug 21,2021
My Opinion | 124263 Views | Sep 10,2021
My Opinion | 122039 Views | Aug 07,2021
Dec 22 , 2024 . By TIZITA SHEWAFERAW
Charged with transforming colossal state-owned enterprises into modern and competitiv...
Aug 18 , 2024 . By AKSAH ITALO
Although predictable Yonas Zerihun's job in the ride-hailing service is not immune to...
Jul 28 , 2024 . By TIZITA SHEWAFERAW
Unhabitual, perhaps too many, Samuel Gebreyohannes, 38, used to occasionally enjoy a couple of beers at breakfast. However, he recently swit...
Jul 13 , 2024 . By AKSAH ITALO
Investors who rely on tractors, trucks, and field vehicles for commuting, transporting commodities, and f...
May 24 , 2025
Public hospitals have fallen eerily quiet lately. Corridors once crowded with patient...
May 17 , 2025
Ethiopia pours more than three billion Birr a year into academic research, yet too mu...
May 10 , 2025
Federal legislators recently summoned Shiferaw Teklemariam (PhD), head of the Disaste...
May 3 , 2025
Pensioners have learned, rather painfully, the gulf between a figure on a passbook an...
May 24 , 2025
First came the trickle, then the torrent. On a humid night in late March, a low-lying neighbourhood on Addis Abeba's southeastern fringe wat...
May 24 , 2025 . By BEZAWIT HULUAGER
When Moses Akuei received his geology degree from Wolaita Sodo University, the 27-year-old from South Sud...
May 24 , 2025 . By BEZAWIT HULUAGER
The Central Bank is launching a sweeping initiative to overhaul the agricultural finance system, targetin...
Federal legislators are considering a bill that would allow foreign nationals to lease land and own resid...